Prologue

The idea of an alternate-frequency future, the same alternate-frequency future continues to impress upon me. This month I am slipping into it every night, the whole first week of the month. I find it challenging to bring back with me. I return with the awareness of the experience, but the concepts and data it contains are so great that all I can do is let it go and fall into another area of my dreaming. If I could get into a full out-of-body state and shift from it directly back into physical space I know more of its content would come through with me. I am working on this through the month and will continue for as long as the information keeps coming. I notice it does so on the heels of the new consciousness experiment, achieving a regular contact who will pass information on to me in the etheric frequency bandwidth —for me to bring back into physical space. I am looking for more ways/opportunities to support and reinforce my focus in this endeavor.

I have always had a habit of scanning the fields and condensing data into singular concepts. I may begin to make a point of logging these concepts here forward. They seem to be informing me of something. “Dark” >> the word DARK is presenting itself en masse these past months from both the inner and outer fields. Following it are the concepts of “extraction” and “royalty”.

>> DARK — EXTRACTION — ROYALTY

How might I read this?

….

Dream Titles

• A meeting with my new experiment partner?
• Night sweats, ( an almost fever )
• Enormous flows of energy, exhaustion
• Geometrically speaking the “motherload”—john, adventure, treasure, dagger
• All work and no play
• Dark, shadows, electrostatic charge
• Old friends; the elements, the air and the Fae ( a hopeful thought for humanity )
• Civilization, collapse, passing on my contact numbers
• Frequency future, alternate society *keeps pressing upon me
• Pamela Aaralyn contact, acquiring a download
• International intrigue, Russian girl targeted and pursued
• Selenite, a hint to clear my field
• Humanity’s work, finding harmony in dichotomy
• Superimposing fields, alterations in physical space
• Again—the health and clearing of my system
• Something new for me to work on
• Embedding and the emotional body >> under the microscope
• Poor sleep hygiene, failure to embed ( 3 “bits )
• Spiral geometry, apocalypse, art and the ancients
• Night sweats, healing, the spiritual war and oneness of all things
• The natural flow of life as it is, big change
• Walking, hallways, corridors, classes and bathrooms
• The balance point, on the verge of here, there and everywhere
• Condensing dreams down into a single symbol, one word says it all
• Sun, light, water, mud, seeds, planting
• The Claars and Quaneys, the rate at which family lines are reproducing
• Anomalies, unusual shifts, shaking things up
• Debt incurred to the fallen archangels
• Pirated, ship out at sea, a turning of the tides
• Royalty, a full facial view

….

April 30, 2023

Royalty, a full facial view

I carry just one piece of information forward with me, there is no time for further embedding ( it is a work day ). I am “on the line” and being connected with another female. I am being told about her in the background. One thing being said, that stands out to me is how pretty, and even beautiful she is. I see her in a crowd of seated others, in a stadium-like setting and as the orator speaks I get a full face front and profile view of her. The face is angular, with sharp lines, strong features, high cheekbones. The hair is sandy blonde, thick and cut well above the shoulders in a way that frames the face. “If she is pretty”, I am thinking, “it is in a Barbara Streisand sort of way.” I know the orators are referring to her overall energy signature and the extremely high regard in which she is held. She is royalty. Or, let me say, perhaps more accurately, her bloodline is. It seems to me, though, from what I can feel, that she also holds a high station. In a “royal” kind of family. Yet here she is sitting comfortably with the people. In what could be the bleachers around a basketball court. I do not have time to look around and see exactly where we are. I see only her and what is in the immediate vicinity, directly around her. 

April 29, 2023

Pirated, ship out at sea, a turning of the tides

I spend a short, but significant enough amount of time observing the people and activity on board a ship that is being overtaken by another. There is a female of high station, the equivalent of a princess who I am mostly observing. In the end, when it is clear there is no escape, the majority of those on board kill themselves rather than let themselves be taken. This female has failed in fully suiciding herself with a guillotine-like device. She is injured but the blade does not take her head. She is taken by those on the other ship. She will now have to undergo a ritual they are calling “the shaming”. She is proud and will not easily become subservient to the other group. She will have to be broken. The men, mostly in good humor are looking forward to this. The woman is already being re-clothed, having her identity shifted and given tasks to perform. 

One of the tasks involves coloring in a hand drafted image of the senior female on board the new ship. The other girls working on this with her are placing their due attention on it, but the captured female, who is of higher station takes over and in a hurried fashion draws outside the lines and makes the hair, which is being colored pink, look a bird-nesty mess. This is exactly what the senior ranking men expected. She is already being told she is only making herself, her own skills look poor by behaving so. She sees the truth in this easily and knows she has to position herself differently, redevise a new strategy. I see her again, acclimating to her new situation, her new clothing, boarding another area of the ship as my alarms for working begin going off. She is wearing leather clothing now, rather than fabrics more feminine. The skirt is short rather than long. It is meant to demean her for a time but she is holding herself above all this. She is acclimating well, more beneficially and fitting to her new position. She is beginning to accept and fit in to the new life.

April 28, 2023

Debt incurred to the fallen archangels

I am meeting up and connecting with Seneca. We have set out to traveling. There are concepts coming through, relative to why I have connected with her, associated with the new water purification filter/system I have recently chosen for myself. It is called “Clearly Filtered“. This information is in the background and I am not accessing it as consciously, or cognitively as I would like but I do see it is at the core of this connection and the experience now in play. At the moment we are in a hotel room with all the dogs and cats. Someone has used the bathroom and I am trying to open a door leaving the screens shut, so none of the animals get out. The scene shifts into the idea of a night club, the scene is bare bones, just a darkened set of rooms with a single table. Patricia bleeds into the scene. ( she and Seneca are both women I currently work with ). 

A young man walks into the scene and comes near to us. He asks for someone to dance with him. Patricia volunteers. She has been drinking. There is something about a money card, which has now become a set of 4 or 5 cards which Seneca arranged to have funds put on but when someone uses them they have to pay back to Entity from which she got these. I don’t want to have anything to do with them. I am doing all I can to steer clear. Some of us have walked out a door, up a set of stairs and through another door into another darkened room. Things get out of hand. I lose a lot of the plot here but know I have lost some of my ( plumb colored ) clothes. 

Water is coming into the scene, *not just a little but a FLOOD. Everyone is trying to get out but things still need to be paid for. I try to vacate the room myself, before it is too late, but have to go back in to re-dress. I have to find my top. Inside the room I climb another set of stairs, the water ( like a thick, fierce energy ) is coming down hard. It is like a tornado in here. I see Seneca’s payment card, which has become 4-5 cards and somehow use them to pay what is required. I get my top on and barely make it out of here. Now back in the room we first started in, Seneca and I are seated and in a heated discussion about the payment cards. She is saying “well I told you this wouldn’t work unless we brought in the fallen archangels.” I am aghast, “you did not tell me that!” I say, “unless it was when the music was playing and I just didn’t hear you.” 

I can’t believe this has happened. I am quite shocked. The jolt is actually so significant it throws me hard and fast back into physical space. I have written as much as I can recall. Save for a brief conversation I had with Patricia about the emotional state of the young man who had asked us for a dance, which was one of lowly desperation. I could see this, too. Patricia said this is why she said yes and danced with him. I thanked her genuinely for doing so.

As I am waking it is to the song : Solitary Man

Still. so. good.  !!!

April 27, 2023

Anomalies, unusual shifts, shaking things up

The past few day I have been impelled at night, roughly an hour before going to bed to do my 5 minute nitrous oxide dump. It is interesting to me that at this hour I have the energy for it, a good store of energy for it. The five minutes is easy, the movements feel really good to me. More normally at this hour this is very definitely not the case. I would like to see this trend continue. I am mentioning it, notably because it seems to be causing an alteration in my level of awareness in the fields. I am alert – again – to the dreams happening at the top portion and middle of the night. Alert in the moment of them occurring, anyway, they are still challenging for me to hold to any longer than they are actually in play but I do realize this much; I have been dreaming and the dreaming is significant, meaningful,  r e a l. It is this way again tonight. I am dreaming and alert to the dreaming in the moment, all night and morning. However, tonight, the shifts toward the beta waves are like a shock, or quick jolt to my system as the conscious mind, in the beta waves rouses to the inner activity. The data quickly vanishes and is gone. Three times this happens tonight. And, this is interesting, worth noting >> at each interval at which it does, what must have been roughly 1am, 4am and 7am it seemed as though it should have been much later ( in real time ) than it was. It is unusual for this to happen, and unheard of so many times in a row in a given night. I aim to look more into this to get a better look under the hood.

April 26, 2023

The Claars and Quaneys, the rate at which family lines are reproducing

In the dream, which seems to be on the spiritual side of life, I simply have the proud honor of introducing the newest Quaney birth. I see the Quaneys, it’s representatives which are reproducing, the new births and rate of new births. I then see this in relation to my own family line, which is not reproducing quite as much. I am surprised for a moment that the numbers are not further apart, our own births seem so sporadic relative to theirs. The ratios are fluctuating but are roughly 1.53 to 1.26 per couple, per lifetime. This is well below what is necessary for human population sustainability. This indicates a quite severe decline, not only in the human population but societal reigns and structure(s). In the life-between-life area from which I am viewing there is now something with a ladder, going slightly up and slightly down the ladder. In an area slightly up I see my dad, or who played my dad in this current lifetime. He does not look like himself, I think maybe he is reborn. He looks like a Native Indian. The energy is very attractive. There is interaction here between us, data passed on, but this has stayed where we are, in the in-between ( the back of my awareness ), it has not carried forward with me.

April 25, 2023

Sun, light, water, mud, seeds, planting

I am going around the yard looking for the best places for planting. I want to find Ryn to ask if I can plant tomatoes over chainlink fenced area around the back but I cannot find him. There is a central element to this activity. I have acquired for myself a 500 gallon, glass walled, elongated hexagonal shaped water basin that I have moved from the inside to outside. While time goes by and much attention is given, and data is transferred to me about this water catchment, there is a great wind and storm that rolls over. My attention is on the water, the catchment, the shape of it and other things, I hardly notice the storm happening. Until, after it passes, as I am going out to work with my new structure I notice the water inside is getting dirty. It is open at the top and has no lid to cover the water over. I am now berating myself for not being more alert. How could I have let this happen? I also, in the back of my mind suspect someone may have been using it like a lake for bathing. I cannot prove this. It is just something that comes to mind and makes sense.

The water cannot stay like this ( contained ), there is too much debris, it cannot just be treated. I somehow turn the whole thing over and empty all the water. I now wonder how I will possibly clean it before refilling. Standing here, looking, I begin to notice something odd, something interesting. The grass and plants underneath where the glass catchment is positioned are growing to a greater degree than those around it. I would have thought what was underneath would not grow at all. This is phenomenal. I lift and move it to the side and the grass, plants and flowers all pop up tall and spring to life. A lovely patch in the same elongated hexagonal shape as the catchment. The energy I am receiving from seeing this is energizing to me. So sublime. It is just such a magical thing. How has this happened? Something is coming to me about the sun, the light, the glass, the water—all the correct elements coming together to make the conditions just right for this to happen. My body ( back in the bed ) is in an ecstatic state, receiving this data transfer.

As the data comes, I continue my search for Ryn, my mind once again on the planting. I still can’t find him. I have passed through a white, narrow walled structure to use the facilities. I am coming back out again when I pass Dawn, who is coming in. The space is so narrow only one can pass through at a time and we have to walk sideways in order to do so. She mentions this, pointing it out and making a snarky comment. I see her from above, backlit by the light of the day, heading into where the light no longer reaches as we both go on our way. When I return to the area where my catchment structure is I see it has been opened up at one of the seams, the bottom has been removed and the sides spread out wide to form what is now a community lounging area for folks. What a wonderful secondary, temporary use of the structure while I get everything figured out. Ryn has done this, he is the only one who could have done this ( he can build and fix anything ). With this thought, I see him. We are now floating in side-by-side pools.

There is a data and energy transfer between us, my body ( back in the bed ) is in the same ecstatic state, still receiving the transfer. There is a brief conversation between us, he is saying to not be concerned that we are both naked. I now notice this. I am not concerned in the slightest. I stand up and step out of the pool. It feels so good to be in my more fundamental state. I look down at myself. This is not my current body. It is taller, leaner and smaller breasted. My attention, from here, begins shifting back toward physical space. Where I am laying in the bed, in sleep paralysis, a blissful, ecstatic state of vibration. I can hear the work men, Ryn and the boys outside talking. 

I don’t want to move, but the lawn guy is here, too, with the leaf blower and I know I should get up to close the window. I do this, carrying the vibrational state with me as I do, all the way to the window and all the way back into the bed. Phenomenal. The state is so complete it stays stable even as I get up to perform the task. The inner field and activity perfectly synchronized with the outer. Extraordinary. All pertinent data from the dream is likewise stable.

I don’t need to employ anything of myself to hold to it.

The vibration is holding it all in perfect place.

April 24, 2023

Condensing dreams down into a single symbol, one word says it all

As I am shifting from the dream fields back into my room I can feel my low energy and know I cannot hold to the dreams which have been in play so I, quickly, condense them all down into a single word concept which comes easily and immediacy : DESTRUCTION.

April 23 2023

The balance point, on the verge of here, there and everywhere

Beautiful balance point state all night and early morning, right up to the time I have to get up for work ( 6am ). I could have accessed any and all data. But I didn’t. I am just too tired and the state itself is so pleasant I just let myself enjoy it. I will try to say something about this particular state of consciousness deeper into the week. I am still recovering from the weekend ( work shifts ) at the moment. If I don’t, I will make a point of getting to this soon, perhaps in an article of its own as STATES, consciousness states themselves are a very big part of what I am experiencing this month. They are the tried and true favorite experience. States will near always trump / take precedence over the data contained and transferred to me through them. In the instance of it being a choice of the one or the other, I will near always choose to draw directly from the state itself.

April 22, 2023

Walking hallways, corridors, classes and bathrooms

I begin at a new university level campus. I am leaving one class and being directed to my next, which is in room 502. I am in the correct hallway, or corridor but there is no room 502. I find a little assistance, a young man ( who looks like this guy from the institute of human anatomy ) but even together we are not able to find a room numbered 502. In the mix of all this, entwined into it I have a conversation with another young man who has characteristics and energy similar to Eric ( tides2dust ) about food, specifically sugar. He has brought two tiny slices of pie, each has a different filling. I think one is pecan and the other apple. I show him a tiny slice I had brought for myself, which is blueberry, it is funny to me that his slices are even tinier than my own, although there are two of them. In the end I wind up in a classroom. I am not sure it is room 502 but it is a classroom. It is small, maybe ten students are in here and a male professor. I am trying to glean the subject but my attention is already beginning to fade.

Now I am walking down halls again, this time in what looks more like a mall, looking for a bathroom. After looking and looking I finally see a men’s bathroom and begin to feel hopeful but the feeling is soon squashed when not too far from it there is another but it, too, is a men’s bathroom. At this point I am growing quite frustrated, and even angry, talking out loud to myself about the ridiculousness of this. Women’s bathrooms should be everywhere, women always have to go, certainly much more than men. A feminine energy comes in to help me. She directs me to the furthest area of the mall, through a door and into the furthest area of the space inside, which looks something like a hair salon and which begins to have a bathroom looking area. The toilets are very different, instead of being made of porcelain they are covered in a gold brocade kind of cloth. I can’t possibly see how this will do, how the cloth would keep dry and clean. There is a cloth covered flap inside that I can’t figure out. A female helper pushes the flap out of the way making it easier for me to fathom how to use. These are also the kind of toilets that spray water up at you. I find one that doesn’t have someone sitting right next to it ( there are no walls around the toilets ) and am preparing to make use of it as I begin to wake. My alarm has just gone off. It is time to get up for work.

April 21, 2023

The natural flow of life as it is, big change

I am going out traveling, taking a 10 day vacation. Darr has gone out ahead of me, as usual she has planned her trip out to the tee and filled it with lots of activity. One of the places she had arranged to stay a day or two is with an elderly woman who is a friend of mine, Mrs. Jean May. She returns before I myself head out. In quite the inverse, I do not plan my trip at all. In fact it is only the day that I am heading out that I even arrange a place for me to stay. I ask Jean if I can stay there with her the whole 10 days. I have no activities planned for myself, my idea is to align with synchronicity for the extended period, re-centering myself in the natural flow of life as it is, doing nothing until the moment an idea occurs to me. While there, I broadly recall interacting with many of the animals, with many people passing through including her husband, Clifford May, a famous architect in the Los Angeles area, circa 1960s, and scooping up handfuls of quarters ( big/large change ). In a moment in which I feel I may be helping myself to too much, I hesitate and try to lay some back down. It doesn’t look right, feel right in my hand, and I hear that I can help myself to all that I can take so I go ahead and scoop back up the lot.

April 20, 2023

Night sweats, healing, the spiritual war and oneness of all things

Night sweats.— the heat ( and healing ) is intense.

All day, from the time I first woke all the way through to the nighttime I am in a state that is on the verge of falling back off to sleep. I resist the urge, I am not sure why, it is more usual that I would let myself re-synch with the dream state. Perhaps I am curious of whether the state will fade as the day goes on, notably at night as the sun goes down, when at times over the past months I have, in reverse fashion been coming more into wakefulness, to the point of not being able to easily drop off to sleep. My rhythms have been all over the place. Tonight, however, the state on the verge of sleep continues through the after dinner hours until I let myself fall off at 11pm.

In the heat of the night sweats, where I first come alert in the night I am in two areas synchronously. In the one I am with John and we are discussing the idea of there being a spiritual war. I am explaining the chess game we are all playing, the masses who are now being removed from the planet and how it is those who are, are maintaining their footing. I am explaining the difference between being a pawn and what I am calling a “strategist”. The latter moving its mind and position on the field more intelligently ( for the whole ), rather than being moved/manipulated. There is a truth beyond the concept of the spiritual war ( the oneness of all things ), it must be aimed at and arrived at in order to advance.

In the second area Guidance is behind me, there is healing in the works, my attention is being directed to a rack of clothing. I pick up this one item that is a deep terra cotta color. It is on a hangar I am now holding up with my left hand. I am inspecting it. What I see here is somewhat flat and shaped like the number 8. I want to say it is a pod, it unzips around its circumference and inside is a long dress of the same terra cotta color. It is tastefully slit up the one side and has spaghetti string straps. There is a lot more that is beginning to happen here, much of which has now faded to the recesses of my awareness but it involves people, the skin, and lesions on the skin. 

Again in synchronous fashion two things begin happening— I begin to look in a mirror at the back of my-(naked)-self, there is a large abrasion of some kind at the back of my left side, shoulder blade to hip and I am seeing these silver dollar sized, suction cup shaped red bumps/protrusions also on my back but more notably the back of my left arm where there are three of them. I first saw these on the others, this is what led to me inspecting myself. At the same time, back with the dress, I am expressing to Guidance that this kind of dress will be more fitting on someone more slight, more slim. As I say this, I see sitting to the front of me a middle-aged Spanish woman in her late 50s. 

I try to give the dress to the woman and all of us shift into a bathroom. It gets confusing here, there is a mix of her not knowing what to do, she cannot take it and she cannot say no. There is a lot of activity in the background now, I think everyone is trying to figure out what to do. I think the woman attempts to try the dress on but something happens. I see a large burst of something yellow splatter all over the white tiled shower wall. It shocks me for a moment. It just came out of nowhere. What is this?? I move in to have a closer look but am already beginning to fall through the frequencies, seeing everything all at once. Ultimately it is too much to consciously hold.

From my bed I try to re-enter the scenes but it is no use.

Cover songs are already being implemented.

April 19, 2023

Spiral geometry, apocalypse, art and the ancients

These kinds of experiences can be among some of the most challenging to describe. There are geometries within them, connection points between discrete points in time that add to the amount of information passed on but it can confuse one as to where the experience begins and where it ends. It can be challenging to choose a point from which to relay it. I will begin in the forest, on the land, I do not know why I have come out of doors, why I am here, it is not safe. Something has happened to the animals, and most dramatically to the snakes. Those out here where they are rarely make it out of here. They have become monstrous.

There is an intense bit of drama at this juncture where the snakes find me, there is a fight for my life and escape. —and then I am back in my apartment. Note: it is more likely that I actually died back there and the scene was reset with me now in the apartment. Almost like a death and rebirth into another lifetime that picks back up right back in the same place. The same story, the same situation, there has been an apocalypse, the snakes are the clean-up crew.

There are still survivors of whatever it is that happened, or went wrong, for the most part everyone keeps to themselves in their own apartments or homes. Likely it is food that I had gone into the forrest for, others do the same. Food is rationed, we eat together just once a day. I live here with two others, one of them is who I know as Darr in my current life. Taking even a single small bite of food when the group is not together is the greatest of crimes and is often punishable by death. I am alone here at the moment, the others have gone scavaging, the larger of the two is armed with a military grade rifle. A knock comes at the door. I open it to see a letter has been left for me. Mail services are still running, I think to myself, not to par but people are trying. It is a letter I wrote long ago to my great aunt Edith, it is has been returned unopened, unread. This comes as a great shock to me. I had written the letter when I was 19 years old, I am remembering this all now.

Here in the experience I know just what the letter contains. I am going over it all in my mind, the consequences of it not reaching its intended contact. Now I cannot recall at all, only its importance, and that it has come back to me unread. It is dizzying. The letter inside the envelope, all these years later has disintegrated into dust inside the envelope. I am devastated. 

The others are returning home, there is another knock at the door, I hesitate letting them in because there are no secrets inside, everything is everyone else’s business. The knocking gets louder as I numbly think to myself and, following a long few minutes, I decide to tuck the returned letter away, walk to the door and open it. As I do, and the activity continues on from here I have the stark realization of the dream prior to this, a lifetime that led me to the one I am now experiencing. The remembrance is both enlightening and shocking. I am stunned. I can see the spiral of time, the clockwise and counter-clockwise spiral that synchronously takes me into the past flow events and into the future—in the future I am standing in a beautifully lit earthen hallway with high ceilings in front of piece of artwork I prize and find to be very telling. 

I am standing here with Robyn, we are discussing the one named Jesus and why it is I prefer to send the heart of my faith into something more abstract than a man. The conversation is too deep, too philosophical for me to bring back in full but in essence I am asking her who came before Jesus, who paved the way. We go through the names, deeper and deeper back into the past. “There is always someone who comes first, who comes prior” I say. This is the general idea I am expressing. What I am in a process of pointing to is a great deal more, this is as much as I can still touch.

Jesus, the man, is the youngest of the Masters, and at the same time what might be considered, again in terms of “man”, an evolution of all who came before. He is Jesus, but also comprised of so much more than we tend to see. I bring the attention back to the large piece of artwork on the wall in front of us and go on to say, “this is why I like to put my faith in Art.” Notably I am meaning Art in the very specific sense of the artwork now in front of us, which is abstract as well as picturesque, full of geometry, mathematics and knowing—all of which I find to be divine.

April 18, 2023

Poor sleep hygiene, failure to embed ( 3 “bits )

I am surprised I can recall anything at all of my dreams this morning.

It was past 4:30am when I finally went to sleep, I pushed myself to finish watching the series “Taken”. I left the laptop open, playing an interview while I fell off and woke 90 minutes later at 6am to turn it off. I had been sleeping but dreams had not really embedded. I say “deeper embed”, and then “what am I dreaming?” as I walk myself over to the bathroom. I get a quick flash and brief glimpse into three discrete points. >>>

• It is night, I am in the driver’s seat of a large, lifted truck slowly moving through a highly foot trafficked area. I am having to navigate my way around the crowds of people moving through, at one point having to come to near a dead stop due a boy standing in the road square in front of me. I signal him with a nod when he sees me and give him time to move off to the side before continuing. Other slightly older boys, perhaps just 20 or so years old notice me now. They are envious of me being in a vehicle while they are on foot and come after me. I vacate the vehicle and hide myself in an empty room. The door is slightly ajar. I hear someone coming and lift a baseball bat to defend myself but when the person comes in it turns out to be a friend. What a relief. Another person is coming, ( I move into defense ), it is a friend also. Then another, >> another friend! This is all such a relief. This last person I can still see. It is a young, 30 year old, light black skinned woman with short curly hair worn tight to the head.

• I am at a cash register trading blank pages in a book for something else. The pages are a deep blue, almost purple color. I can no longer see what I am trading them for. There are two young boys behind the counter, one behind the register. They are two of the three who had just come after me. The one at the register is the older of the two, but just by a year or so. He is content with two sets of 6 pages for the trade. The younger asks the other if that is really enough. It is agreed it is a fair trade.

• Mom and I are walking side by side down a dirt grade. The ground is not even, she takes a slightly highly higher path to the right of me that has what is for her better footing. I take the left, it is a steeper, funner grade that I have to slide down to a certain point. It is exhilarating, I have so much fun with the sensation of the sliding that I repeat the scene multiple times. The grade looks like it could be at the side of the house I am now with the steps that are there now removed. I am all but certain that it is.

April 17, 2023

Embedding and the emotional body >> under the microscope

It is 7 o’clock in the morning, I am laying here, eyes wide open for some time before even realizing it. How strange it is when this happens.  I realize I am talking with someone, in part my own self about the two main differences in the way dream state data can meet physical space. I am noting the dreams from earlier in the night, the way they did not embed enough to be carried, held, processed through the beta frequency wave, what we call the “conscious” mind. The dreams were long, clear and deep while in the event of them. I followed clearly/consciously through them all, but they fractured upon re-entry. They didn’t embed. Why didn’t they embed? Through the main dream of the night a young man has asked me to go somewhere with him. I am not really dressed right and my clothing doesn’t match, in their style nor colors ( tan and sky blue ). I can change this, though, and I do. I go with him. Each time, he asks me to go to another place with him. This continues, place after place. This is all there is, the detail is all gone. I briefly recall that somewhere in there I step up to a seated Anthony Hopkins, I set a clear glass down next to him which I then notice has little raw meat bits on it left from my hands. 

I am asking, calling for stronger embeds. I do not like it at all when the dreams do not embed.
I get up to use the bathroom then go back in >>>

Emotional maze structure. It has been used on me before, this same template, which is an apartment of sorts with unique and very high quality appointments. The trigger being used on me is my white garbage pail being removed when I need it. I search and search and cannot find it. In the search I am discovering very interesting areas of the apartment, the appointments, and even people in the extended area but I am also getting increasingly more emotional as I go, to the point of screaming out in tears “why do they keep removing it!” again and again and again. Robyn bleeds through into the environment, as do three others who I know and are friends. I can’t understand why they are not helping me. They see I am in distress, I keep calling out in distress, but no-one steps in to lend a hand. Note: I notice when I wake that Robyn and the others are not themselves. Robyn does not act like herself when I confront her and ask why she has not stepped forward to help. There is no personality, no emotion, no character. I get the idea this is likely a hologram brought in to make me feel “at home”, or even possibly an ET using her appearance, of a species without emotion as we know it. 

I pass through many areas of the apartment, every nook and specifically-functioning area is almost like a universe of its own, vast and endlessly explorable. I pass through so many of these little universes I can no longer recall them all, but through them I continue looking for my white garbage pail with a bit of earth, crumbled leaves and amber colored crushed ice ball in my hands to throw away. I almost can’t stand the idea of dropping bits of this all over the place while I look. I get lightly interested in an interesting little projection area—there is a white flat screen on the wall, two comfortably cushioned, softly pink seats directly to the front of it which pull back from the screen to form the geometry of an elongated triangle; a light is shined from behind the head(s) of the person or people who are seated and moving pictures appear up on the screen. I somehow just know this, as a single pointed eye moving through. I finally do find something I can use AS a trash receptacle in a back bathroom that does and does not belong to me.

It is an interesting idea to explore… As I am moving through the apartment, or compartment, it expands from a 1 bedroom 1 bath to a 2 bedroom 2 bath, but it is like the idea of two circles coming together to overlap and forming the shape of a vesica pisces in the middle—a shared space, or space “common” to the two independent circles. It is an infinite, open portal through which endless new areas and ideas are in continuous fashion pouring into the experience at large. Adding and adding to it. In this back bathroom is an abundance of royal blue and bright yellow. In the context of tiles, fixtures and appointments. There is old toilet of this bright yellow color stored away in the shower. It still has a golden colored urine in the pot. It is at this juncture, as I close the shower door that I begin to see through this area, through a large, room sized clear glass window into an extended area of this structure. So many environments are superimposing but one of them, I am beginning to glean is the craft I am actually upon ( I am being observed again ). As I look through the glass myself, into this other area, it is a glimpse into an administrative area. In front is a man leaning over a desk.

Before even actually realizing I find I am walking down a hallway with him. He is emotional and upset. He has worked here a lifetime, he is a Harvard graduate, he does his job well and of all people he is the one who has just been let go from his position. It is just as he is beginning a family, I can see them, his wife and two young sons, aged 5 and 7. This could not have come at a worse time. It could collapse the whole family unit. I can hear all of this, all his thoughts, feel all of his feelings. His sense of duty to support and grow the family is strong. I am at one point standing in a small group of 3 or 4 others together with the wife. Cleaning is the subject of discussion, cleaning out the cars. I tell them to look in mine, ( it is right here ), and say “I have had it for 3 years now and it is still so spotless it requires no vacuuming out.” Note: this is happening on a day that I plan to take my car to the carwash and lube shop. I am beginning to detect the shift back toward physical space. I am beginning to feel my body, its state of exhaustion, my sense of content to just lay here and dream and not move all day. I can take the car tomorrow. It was a push to aim at today anyway. 

In the shift an extra piece of data is filtering through to me, it is the idea that 
the data on the husband IRL pertains to my brother, Derrick.

This comes as quite a jolt, a significant jolt.

*  *  *

It is almost 12 noon.

April 16, 2023

Something new for me to work on

No data. Having to wake early after just a few hours sleep to the work alarms on the weekends is becoming a thing. It is perhaps a significant part of this, that I know there is little to no time for recall and logging the data. So I just let it all go. I can’t help but think, though, that there can be SOMETHING. A meaningful, condensed little something that could be left with me that would be easy to write down. I am going to work on this. I seriously do not like coming back with nothing.

April 15, 2023

Again—the health and clearing of my system

Dreams are shattered by my work alarm. If only I could have awoken naturally, even just minutes prior to the alarm I could have brought them all back. They were all beautifully intact, all through the night right up to that moment. I recall that the experience is one I have had many times before. I remember a segment involving fourths, visually this looks like 4 equal sized, connected rectangular shapes. And I know the experience was about health and the clearing of my field. This is all that made it back with me.

April 14, 2023

Superimposing fields, alterations in physical space

House—neighborhood—I am meandering around each. In the house I am remodeling my bedroom, specifically making changes with my bed, the bedding and window dressings. My sister, Sandy, is here and has rooms in the house as well. In the neighborhood I am shifting in and out of many of the houses, observing their layouts and also looking for ideas, as well as connections between the ideas in them and my own. I meet a woman who lives with another female, a sister?, who I am going to begin working with for an hour or two each Tuesday. The work is health and body work related.

On one of my turns through the neighborhood she inquires about our appointment that was supposed to be today, I had completely forgotten! ( how could I have forgotten?? ). I apologize, quickly head home to clean up for it then make my way back to her house for the appointment *which I am showing up just a bit a later for than we had planned. I tell her I really like what she has done with her bedrooms, but once in her house I see they were not hers but belonging to another house in the neighborhood. The scenes begin superimposing, >> 

Now and I am back walking around the neighborhood, I am passing by a house that has a whole, very large family sitting outside eating peaches. I am almost passing it by when I realize it is the Corso/Carsons! Maria pops out and we begin talking for awhile. Lucile pops in for a bit of the discussion. I can no longer hear what it entailed but I can feel my joy at seeing and interacting with all their energy. It is connected to what I am doing in my own house with the remodeling, or redecorating. The new accents I am choosing. All this begins superimposing with real life and the new faucet and showerhead, etc.. I am installing >> in the shift back toward physical space. 

Once back I feel refreshingly content and happy, so comfortable laying here in the bed and feeling very well rested. It has been some time since this last happening, too long of a time, I realize for a moment how much I value this,  s t r e t c h  and send out my loving gratitude.

April 13, 2023

Humanity’s work >> finding harmony in dichotomy

I am not sure I have ever experienced anything quite like this before. A repeating theme but changing landscape, depicting example after example of factions fitted against one another.— groups, or classifications of individuals put at odds and in very unique sets of challenges in seeking balance >> harmony. In all cases the groups are in some way caged, held to a very particular circumference or parameter. At first, for example I am on an island. One group is mostly children, they are lead by a single mid-aged adult male and the other group is all adult. One might think this unfair, I did myself as I grew to understand what was happening within the event, but interestingly the children and adults were equally matched and there were always an equal number of each. These groups were in fact warring, actively fighting, at times to the death. Not unlike a Mandelbrot, this environment ( and I with it ) falls into another on the same theme, only this time the division is not age but race and class. 

As I come into this scenario I am standing aside a light skinned young black woman with thick, shoulder length curly hair at the deep end of an empty 15-20 foot deep swimming pool. There is another young black woman down here as well. One is in a contraption of harnesses and ropes and although I am not yet clear what is happening it is growing clearer that in being sent down here in this contraption it was expected by the upper class above that she would die. Others down here are helping, not hurting her, they are staying out of the sight of those above and are in a process of attempting to fool those above by getting the woman out alive. The two black women look remarkably alike, they could be twins, or even clones. When I get up top it is night, I see we are in an area where the underclass are housed, and those who take advantage of them visit. 

I shift inside one of the dwellings,— 

Performances go on here all night, like the old speakeasies of the prohibition era. I am standing in a narrow stairwell, a male singer is just getting off stage and another male, a stage manager of sorts is asking how many sets he will be performing tonight…….”four” the man simply replies. At the front door an inspector is arriving, the door is wide open, the young man who has opened it is announcing that everything is alright, “he is not here to arrest anyone tonight.” The energy in the air is anxious, like everyone is holding their breath, on the edge of their seats ready to run. I fall through this into another, and then another, and then another scenario on this same theme. The shifts of the landscapes, the players and groups are so seamless I do not even know they happen until the shift back toward physical space where I begin to see. 

Although near needless to say, this has not been a fun one to experience; the depravity and advantage taken against others. It is sick, and along with the never-ending stream it is almost too much. So much so that I can barely barely pattern any of the data. What I have written here today in this log is nominal relative to what I actually experienced.

April 12, 2023

Selenite, a hint to clear my field

I have to wake early today due to my birthday, Mom is coming by to take me to the temple ( SRF, Self Realization Fellowship ). I just let my dreams go. It has been a rough night anyway. I am hot and can’t get to sleep for hours and hours. I do know and recall the main dream early in the night is one worthy of bringing back, but there is not the time to go in for recall. What I have in a snippet of a single conversation. I am being asked if I am wearing my Selenite ( jewelry ). I reply in the affirmative but add that I do not just leave it to the Selenite to clear me of negative influence, I do the work myself as well. I am beginning to go into this, into my own set of preparations and protocols as my awareness begins to fade from the inner fields to the outer and I am back in physical space.

April 11, 2023

International intrigue, Russian girl targeted and pursued

There are two areas of my dreaming that have remained intact. One occurs in manifest, and the other un-manifest space. Only fragments of each are still reachable. In the first there is intrigue, a high consequence chase that periodically, due to an equal intelligence on each side turns around on itself. I am a young female, 16-17 years old, possibly Russian. I am sought by a faction of others, my life is on the line. There is a game of cat and mouse. I evade the others multiple times and even do a fairly good job at times of turning the stakes around on them. There is a boat, a fire—first a fire, somewhere on land I think, some of the others are lost in it, then the boat. This is all I can see of this area. I can say that the experience is challenging for my body, it is in a state of alarm, duress and tension. I feel exhausted to the bone when I get up to use the bathroom. 

In the second area I am in the etheric, in my dad’s house, upstairs in what would have been his room. There is a young man here, I think he is someone from the scene down below. Either at the same time that it is going on, or afterward, after I, or we have potentially passed we have shifted up here. It feels more to me that we are simultaneously in the two areas. I am saying to him that he should take a rest and that I am going to offer him my room. Not the room that I myself will actually be sleeping in, but a room I do sleep in. I point out the doorway and say it is the room across the hall on the left. What would have been my sister, Sandy’s, room when we were growing up. He doesn’t understand, or perhaps just doesn’t see, so I make the wall more invisible for us to see through. He understands now and we both begin to float out into the hallway.

On our way into the other room I see a black dog sitting at the top of the hallway by the linen closet, I call it into the room with us and as he enters, the room shifts into a room in another house. The front door is open, daylight is streaming, the three dogs who live here are meandering out. I walk over toward the door and begin calling them back in. They hear me, and are listening, but decide in the end to follow the leader and run out onto the beach. I shift out here after them. It is late in the day, maybe an hour before sunset. My favorite time of day to experience the beach. It is so real, I am almost so physically here I can feel the sand beneath my feet. There is something my nervous system is blocking me from seeing, though. Is it just my location? The house I had shifted into? Or is it something I see out here on the sand?

I try to push through this for a moment, seeing only the color and texture of the beach sand, while also continuing my efforts to round up the dogs and get them inside. It is a strenuous endeavor, it seems the more I try the further away they are getting from me. In this activity and energy I am shifting back toward physical space. Where I am already beginning to hear the gardener is still working with the leaf blower, at the moment directly below my window. For a moment I try to synch with the sound and vibration, to shift back into the fields, but I can feel it is getting late in the morning. I quickly decide instead that it is time to get up. 

My body still feels very tired—weak and overly tired.

April 10, 2023

Pamela Aaralyn contacts me, acquiring a download

There is a room full of items Pamela has brought to my attention which is, for the lack of a more appropriate concept right now ‘for sale’. The central item, I think is a kind of computer. It is interesting, and I am interested in it, but I am less than impressed at the way she is hard selling me on it. Possibly this is in inserted just to get my attention ( to bring me more consciously alert, it certainly is doing this, I find it possibly even more notable than the rest ) >> though I can’t say for sure. I think I am acquiring the room and all it contains but discover in the end that it is only the central piece, what I am conceptualizing as a computer. I think what I have really just ‘bought’ is a download. I may at some point be happy for it, but right now I am more curious at the emphasis on such a hard sell. Especially when it wasn’t even necessary. 

April 9, 2023

Frequency future, alternate society keeps pressing upon me

I keep dreaming about it this week. It is the same group of individuals, the same society. It is challenging information to bring back with me it seems. Tonight, even though it is the MAIN dream of the night I still struggle to bring it forward with me ( it is so content full ). I am very body tired from a 12 hour work day and I have to wake early for another this morning. Otherwise, maybe I could have embedded something more. I can only say that “something” has happened, something that has affected the whole population. <— this idea keeps impressing upon me. At the tail end of my sleep, a message is coming through. The name of a female actress is given, she is up on stage with a cast of others and they are performing a dance. A sad occurrence is being announced. An unfortunate accident that has led to the death or severe injury of a child. 

April 8, 2023

Civilization, collapse, passing on my contact numbers

Something has happened. Civilization has collapsed. No-one is taking care of the injured so I volunteer myself. The decision is effortless and comes naturally. There is not much I can do for the people except keep them clean and help them pass. Not many are in my care in the makeshift ward at any time, the number of people still alive in the area are few, maybe just in the hundreds. What little supplies there are left are also dwindling to near nothing. 

In the process of caring for the injured, over the years I am elevated in the eyes of the people to someone of great importance. I am often sought for council, what I say is held in high regard. As the experience is ending, as I am moving through a small crowd of people a young man reaches out, puts himself in my path and says he would like to talk. He is showing an interest in me. I casually say “sure, call me sometime” as I see, and reach for a sheet of paper he is holding in his hand. I have a pencil and am going to write down my phone number but it is the strangest thing, I can’t remember what it is. I say “this goes to show you how infrequently I use my phone.” 

I pull out an old flip phone and proceed to remember how to
find my own number. It is a struggle to do so.

Sets of numbers do begin coming to me, I try to write them as he waits and I remember. Additional remnants of memories begin coming to me in the process. In one of them I am on a horse. I myself do not know how to ride a horse but it is like an old muscle memory kicks in and as the horse begins to gallop it suddenly comes back to me and I ride—I ride the feeling of the experience all the way back into physical space. Where I instantly see that the numbers I was recalling, writing and giving to the young man were not my phone number but social security number. 

April 7, 2023

Old friends, the elements, the air and the fae ( a hopeful though for humanity )

Isn’t it so interesting that we can dream, observe ourself dream, and even hold discourse with guidance about the contents of the dream—all at the same time? This is the normal course these days of both my day and night dreams. I no longer find it odd even in the slightest. One day I know I will, with even more regularity and skill break in on a point of awareness behind even all this. But for now, it holds me in total fascination to locate myself as fully as possible, synchronously at each of the three points, in each of these three fields. It is an astounding phenomena to experience in any of the states. The sensation is so unlike anything else. There is so much to learn.

The dreaming tonight is steady and continuous, flowing effortlessly, seamlessly from field to field. I do not even try to hold to it all, but rather just enjoy what is happening, the experience, content and sensations. There is an elemental feel in the air, a magical “not a care in the world’ kind of air. There is just no resistance to anything. There is either the undercurrent of an almost faerie-like joy and happiness or wave of neutral awe. It is a mix of all of this. The observations I make, such as what I have written above in the first paragraph only ignite and intensify the air. I wish I could stay in it forever. I never want to leave. ( but I know I will ).

Vicky is a friend I had when I first moved to San Diego to begin college, I was just 20 years old, we worked at Wherehouse Records together. Lewis I met shortly after, he was a manager at one of the other stores and was relocated to ours. Both of them appeared together in one segment of the dream tonight. I had not seen, or even thought about them in so long. It was good to do so again and the segment flowed easily through to the morning with me. One notable feature of Vicky is that she is quite short ( while in stark contrast Lewis is quite tall ). With her happy, easy to smile, easy to laugh personality it is not hard to imagine her as coming from the Fae.

It is exactly in this light that we both appear together in the space, we are each holding a long, white, bookmark sized ticket in our hands. Across the middle of each, written in black is a series of numbers and letters. It is something like a help ticket, it specifies what we are here to do. Which could be something as little as moving an object a small distance from one location to another. It would seem what we are here to do is for Lewis. I get my thing done and, as is supposed to happen, blink out back into faerie space. But there is a problem. Vicky is not blinking out. I blink back in and ask her what is happening. She confirms she has done what she was sent for but is still here.

The solution I immediately, instinctively come up with is a good one. I run super fast at Lewis and at the last second jump as high as I can into his arms. Not for him to hold onto, I have used him as a leg UP. In the happiness and joy energy this has created I instantly blink out. From Fae-space I watch Vicky do the same. It works for her, too! She blinks out and we go on our way. I have no idea how Lewis experienced this from his side, but maybe, just maybe he will wake wherever he now is having just dreamed of the two of us. Contact has been made for sure.

I wake briefly to use the bathroom, the clock says it is almost 6am.
When I finish I go back in. It is a perfect morning to do so.

The flow is as seamless as before,

I am still moving at a fairly good pace from place to place. I walk from a restaurant over to the bank, taking a seat on one of the sofas in the lounge area. Looking down at myself I see I am still naked as can be. I have been for some while. I don’t even care. I feel like I have full command over the space. It is mine. I feel this way even though I also think I am in real space. No-one even seems to care, or confront me. Even though they are all dressed and I am not. This is the normal. Nothing even seems unusual. Aside from the thought I am getting away with this in real space. I have the thought that “wow, has it really come to this?” I can be like this even here?

Still I do not alert to the sign that I am out of body.

I have a long, pink, contract sized form in my hands which I begin filling out. I watch myself write, on an appropriate line “bank of america” with no capital letters. The handwriting is not mine. I look again to my body, the body is mine, it is even in its present age and shape. I continue filling out the form but gradually let go of the activity out front here when the energy, sensation, frequency feeling of the out of body state begins having its affect on my system. The energy builds, if I have not mentioned this before, to the point I feel I have to release it ( not unlike when engaged in physical sex ). I walk over to the bathroom, enter one of the larger stalls and as usual let myself pee. It is sometimes enough, and sometimes not. In this case it is not and the experience itself begins to dispense. Some people show up back in the lobby, a smartly dressed woman with short dark brown hair is at the front, she gives me a blue poncho style plastic covering to put over myself and suggests I go straight to and stay safely in my car. 

Even while still in this shift back toward physical space I could kick myself for not consciously alerting to such an extended, overt sign of the out of body state—but instantly I am more curious at the sensation of the feeling of normalcy in being naked in real life. Of having nothing to hide in real life. Of having nothing to fear in real life. Of there being nothing for others to judge in real life. Nothing non-ordinary. Nothing not okay. I am quite accustomed to this in areas such as hot springs. Where people tend to be more advanced and adjusted within their being. But in the cities, where so many can be so rigid and mind controlled? This would be a very new turn of events.

Could humanity really get  here? It is a hopeful thought which I will leave off on
and let remain lingering  h e r e  .  .  

Log out.

April 6, 2023

Dark, shadows, electrostatic charge

It is night, I am in a darkened room, working ( processing ) in the shadows. My dad ( deceased ) is here. At times I am conceptually in the empty living room of a house, at other times an empty bar with a dance floor. In the bar it feels like I am mostly processing regret, in the living room I am neutral and simply moving through moments involving others, often repeatedly, taking in and learning what I can. There is an interesting juncture when the room, or my awareness superimposes with physical space and I see I am in actuality, even within the fields laying down in a supine position and the scenes, all of what I am processing is being projected. 

I feel someone enter the room >> there is dialogue coming from somewhere else within me about what we should do about this. I lay calm and still and invoke us all to do nothing. Allow what is about to happen. The being walks over and stands at the crown of my head. In the next instant I feel what I want to call an electrostatic charge through my whole body. This is similar to the vibrations felt when going out-of-body, but also with distinction. I have moved to the bar, I am drinking, sitting at the side of the dance floor, experiencing the sensation of the remnants of regret. It does not feel to me like my own, but surely it is. 

The symbols—the bar, the drinking, the dance floor are all elements from a time in my past, what I simply call “my twenties”, when I veered what might seem way off course. It is here, in this sensation that I begin to see a growth hanging off the back of my left arm. It rests exact at the juncture at which the arm meets the armpit. A silver dollar sized, cauliflower shaped lipoma and 3 foot long flesh tail. It looks similar to the Avatar tails, with the wisps at the end that connect to other beings to experience union. Only it is hanging off the back on my arm. The sensation of regret only intensifies when I come to see it is here. 

Why has it taken me this long to do so, I intoxicatingly wonder. 

I am being spoken to about this but I am a good deal more lost in my wallowing and not much more gets through. Until a young man, 30-something, with light skin and light red hair that is parted on the side enters the space. His appearance is timeless. He literally could reside anywhere between the 1900s and now. I begin to shift back into the house. He is telling me to prepare because he is about to tell me everything—the detail in its entirety about his ET contact. I know what he means by prepare. My mouth in physical space is, and has been bone dry again all night. My body’s water is being used up. I am periodically overheating. 

I walk into the bathroom and pour what ice I have left into a soft, pale eggshell blue colored bowl filled with water that is sitting beside the sink. As soon as I have done it I realize my dad has drunk from this bowl. I don’t know if I want to drink from the same bowl. I am in a process of making it right for myself when I begin to wake. 

Even as I am beginning to wake, an equal portion of myself is walking in contrast
even deeper into the experience. Ready and primed >>

To receive the detail promised. 

*  *  *

Note: I have noticed over the past few consecutive days that the word “dark” is showing up in a lot of my feeds. It has happened enough for me to note it as curious. Not only this, I find that I am interested enough at it to click in and read or watch the video, movie or content. It is unlike me to a degree enough to mention it. What I would say of this, is that it matches a certain feeling in the air, a sensation of the space, a deep and buried knowing >>

That seems to speak of something coming.

April 5, 2023

All work and no play

This month it seems is starting off  s l o w  .  .  . 

Again this morning my sleep state is interrupted, when a team shows up at the front door to install more solar panels on the roof ( again the homeowners have not informed me in advance ). The hammering, sawing and drilling begins immediately. It is many hours later as I am writing this but what I do recall is that I had been alert to my dreaming all through the night again. It is rare, these days, that this is the case so I am mentioning it. What I recall of the many hours long experience *in terms of real time, is that within it I am spanning many months, possibly years, and that I am with many people I know IRL, including John, Erich, and Carie who has recently crossed over. The general theme, or underlying concept I can grasp is that something life shattering is happening and everyone is still wanting to play at things and have fun—while I am working. I can’t stop working. At the tail end of the experience everyone is being partnered up, everyone is either choosing a sexual partner for themselves or a team leader is seeing to this for them—except me, I am not wanting this for myself. There is too much else to do and I am busy doing it.

April 4, 2023

Geometrically speaking the “motherload”—john, adventure, treasure, dagger

Within the context of a much larger experience, again what I key in on is a long walk and talk. This time I am with a male, and although he does not look like himself, I can see may layers deep and know this is John. There are lifetimes of data coalescing—there is that which is central and that which is at the outskirts, the latter is all filtering out and away, while what is central, common to them all is concentrating down into the data comprising the framework of this experience *only a fragment of which am I able to hold onto. We are walking into what I am conceptualizing as a downtown area when John opens a door and goes inside. He is applying for a job. 

John begins to have some difficulty with the ranking personnel inside. In essence another male. I find myself in a telepathic exchange with him wherein I am, in a lighthearted, happy way explaining to this man John’s soul characteristics and traits and confirming, in conclusion, that most do like him. He is given an opportunity, a job, which he immediately sets out to do. I find him burying a treasure in the mud. He has been tasked to bury and then unbury it.

He has dug a fairly deep hole, I can see what he is burying down there. I can see the hilt just barely sticking up out of the mud. It is a dagger. I want to go down there and unbury it. John lets me. It is so exciting, I am having so much fun with this idea of a hidden treasure! It has been an adventure for John, too, but he is letting me partake in it. This feeling of adventure is at the heart of what has allowed me to locate, retrieve and embed this portion of what is in play. I retrieve the dagger and come up to stand beside John. I am holding it my hands when I begin to wake.

April 3, 2023

Enormous flows of energy, exhaustion

Exhaustion again wins the day. This whole past week there is an enormous amount of energy working through me in the night. I wake periodically, as the brainwaves shift through beta to feel this. I am repeatedly stunned at the intensity of the energy. On just about every occasion my mouth is bone dry, as though every bit of water in my body is being used up in these processes. In the past this is something that has only ( or, perhaps just mainly ) happened during “abduction” experiences. What is happening this past week, though, I have not yet been able to see into. So I cannot say with certainty what is in play. If it continues I will make this a priority.

April 2, 2023

Night sweats. ( an almost fever )

A brief note that I am highly alert to my dreaming in full detail at various intervals throughout the night. It is a work morning, though, and between the alarms and not much time to log I fairly much let them go. I just grab a snippet— ….another woman, another long walk and talk. Derrick enters. He is going to take her to the snow. I am here, too, though and I say to him “you can’t take me to the snow in my short pajama bottoms.” My short PJs play a large role in the whole experience tonight. Perhaps because I can feel the ones I have on me IRL even in the dream scenes.

April 1, 2023

A meeting with my new experiment partner?

Up late, and up early for work. I must improve my sleep hygiene.
Less than 6 hours total sleep.

I can see the dream I am having as I wake, I have been in this experience multiple hours ( real time ), but there is not time to gather much of the detail. I can see I am with a woman whose appearance approximately mirrors my own. We are young. We move through various environments and through one of them sit on a park-type bench and talk. ( Question: Is this the meeting with the one I will be working the new consciousness experiment with? ). It does not seem to have much to do with what has been in play throughout the experience, but there is a third person behind us, a male, and for a moment there is a bit of a competition over his attention. He is focused on the task at hand and is not going to be distracted by the play of two young women, but – I think to myself – if he were to be he would choose me. The other girl is even more tom-boyish than myself. We are walking now, moving through a populated area. He is at all times close behind us.